Morbid Real Estate: April Edition

153 Northampton St., Easton.

 

Spring is a popular time to buy a house, but real estate is not something one should buy in haste, lest you end up with a property tainted by the ghosts of long-forgotten tragedies. This month's offerings include a two properties which were the scene of dramatic murder-suicides, a home cursed with a 3-year-streak of peculiar deaths, and a house once inhabited by a murder victim with a laughably bad description proving that real estate agents have the moral compass of 19th century snake-oil salesmen. Enjoy!

153 Northampton St., Easton (Lehigh County). Price: $949,000

153 Northampton St.

With a history of settlement dating back to the early 18th century, Easton is one of our most historically-important cities. It was here where injured soldiers of the Continental Army were treated during the war, where the Declaration of Independence was read aloud for the first time on July 8, 1776, where the bamboo fly-fishing rod was invented, and where Crayons were born.

Not surprisingly, prime commercial real estate in the city's historic district often fetches a handsome price, such as this mixed-use property which features a commercial storefront on the ground floor (currently leased by Edible Arrangements) and residential units above. It also includes five private parking spots in the rear of building, which will probably be commandeered by jerks from Jersey, who, as we all know, are God's Chosen People who firmly believe that turn signals, speed limits, and signs such as "No Parking", "Merge", and "Right Lane Exit Only" do not pertain to them.

This property, which can be yours for just under a million dollars, has also played its own role in Easton history. On the afternoon of April 22, 1932, a 24-year-old woman from Phillipsburg named Ercelle Thomas was shot in the head, in view of dozens of horrified shoppers, by Easton resident William Bennett as she stood outside the door to 153 Northampton Street. Bennett's first shot shattered the shop window, and the second shot struck her in the right side of the head as she attempted to enter the building. She fell dead in the store's entrance. Bennett, who had claimed that Miss Thomas had stolen $75 from him, then ducked into the adjoining doorway and took his own life with the same weapon.

 

336 Beaver Street, Lancaster (Lancaster County). Price: $169,000

336 Beaver St., Lancaster.

 

Next, we have this 1890 brick townhouse in Lancaster, which features 4 spacious bedrooms and boasts a generous 1,230 square feet of living space. Other features include a fenced-in yard, fresh paint, and a newly-sealed basement. With a few interior improvements (unless you have a thing for salmon pink walls with blue trim), this would be a cozy home for young families or first-time homeowners.

336 Beaver St.

 

This otherwise fine home has an unusual past, as three young people from two different families who lived there died prematurely from heart disease-- for three consecutive years! Eight-year-old Charles Fry died of cardiovascular disease on June 13, 1906. Anna Eisenberg, 19, died from heart disease at St. Joseph's Hospital on April 25, 1907, while her younger sister, Bertha, died from heart failure at the General Hospital in September of 1908. So while this home's history may not be spooky, it is certainly morbid.

1045 Blackadore Street, Pittsburgh (Allegheny County). Price: $59,500

1045 Blackadore St., Pittsburgh

 

Thanks to rampant gang activity, high poverty rates and insufferably obnoxious sports fans, Pittsburgh is one of the few places in America where one can buy a home for less than the price of a new car. Not that you'd want to buy a new car in Homewood North anyway, of course, since its crime rates are 71% higher than the national average.

While crime in this neighborhood has earned it an "F" rating from Areavibes, that doesn't stop sleazeball realtors from gilding the proverbial lily. For instance, the Zillow listing for this home states:

Welcome to this fantastic property in Homewood, perfectly suited for immediate move-in or as a turnkey rental opportunity. This charming home features three spacious bedrooms and one bathroom, complemented by a generously sized living room and an eat-in kitchen that's perfect for casual dining. The side yard offers ample space for outdoor activities, while the detached garage provides convenient off-street parking. Recent updates include a newer furnace, updated electrical system, and a modern hot water heater, ensuring efficiency and reliability. Whether you're looking to own a piece of the city or invest in a rental property, this home offers the perfect blend of comfort, functionality, and potential.

Fantastic opportunity, you say? For what? Getting stabbed? And a kitchen "perfect for casual dining"? As opposed to what, hosting a dinner party for college faculty and members of the Chamber of Commerce? And I'm not sure what the listing agent means by "ample space for outdoor activities", unless those outdoor activities involve a late-night exchange of crumbled-up dollars bills for plastic baggies filed with questionable substances.

Apparently, this is what "move-in ready" looks like.

 

But, on the bright side, it's good to know that this craptastic flophouse has a "newer" (Translation: Circa 1955) furnace and an "updated electrical system" (Translation: They installed an extra outlet in the kitchen fifteen years ago). Of course, the listing doesn't say what an uninstalled water heater is doing in the kitchen. My guess is that the seller (Translation: Slumlord) is offering it on Facebook Marketplace in exchange for a Glock 9mm.

 

But, to be fair, Pittsburgh hasn't always been the safest city. In fact, this so-called "charming" home once belonged to a murder victim named Daniel Forlastra, a 39-year-old man who was gunned down by two men on Wheeler Street on April 29, 1934, following a drinking party at a social club.

   
1117-1119 Spring Garden Avenue, Pittsburgh (Allegheny County). Price: $790,000

 

1117-1119 Spring Garden Ave., Pittsburgh

Finally, we have this six-unit multi-family building in Pittsburgh. According to the listing, each unit has fresh paint, new flooring, and new windows, while the building comes with central air conditioning, a new furnace, and a two-car garage. Last sold for $160k in 2021, it's fair to say that the seller has put quite a bit of time and effort fixing up this nearly 150-year-old building. Unfortunately, all the paint and laminate flooring in the world can't cover up this property's blood-chilling history.

1117-1119 Spring Garden Ave.

 

In the 1920s, this building was owned by a man named Frank Jares, who operated a saloon at 1119 Spring Garden Avenue. Shortly after two o'clock on the afternoon of October 19, 1927, the 59-year-old saloonkeeper (some sources give his age as 48), after a morning of arguing with his wife, Sophia, fatally shot her in the basement of the building before firing a bullet into his own brain.

That crooked blank wallplate is driving me crazy.

 

It was a saloon patron named Fred Baker who heard two gunshots coming from the cellar. He raced down the stairs and found Sophia's body on the floor, her feet laying atop the bottom step. Her husband had shot her in the forehead, above the left eye. The body of Frank Jares was beside her, face down, with a gunshot would in the right temple. Surprisingly, both husband and wife were still alive. Sophia, however, died before help could arrive, while Frank was rushed to Allegheny General Hospital, where he died the following morning.

 

According to the Pittsburgh Sun-Telegraph, Jares had regained consciousness just long enough to make a confession to detectives. The saloonkeeper claimed that his wife had been nagging him to sell the property. "I stood her nagging for years and then took her on a visit to her old home in Germany, thinking that would quiet her," stated the killer. "When she came back to this country she seemed contented for a few weeks, but started her complaints again and demanded that I sell my property and leave... I had a few drinks in me and I made up my mind that I would try to get some peace. And so here I am."